A few weeks ago, I was able to take a full day to just be with my Papa. Getting ready that morning, I felt so giddy as if I were going on a date. Once I left the house, these nerves just came over me. I started asking Him some questions such as, what He wanted to do with me that day, and if there were any specifics He wanted to talk about. My voice was quaking. Unquestionably I had built this up in such a way that resembled some greatly anticipated first date. Catching me off guard, this large dog ran towards me. He sprang up. His paws were placed on my arms and we danced for a short while. I got all smiley. It felt like Papa speaking to me at that moment. I was reminded that it was God with me, which meant there was no pressure because I’m known and loved by Him. The nerves had left. I knew that there would be joy throughout our day together. Onwards we went, freely chatting about all the things and dreaming together. I got to be with, hear, trust, and be led by Him. In that place of solitude, He met me.
Date with PapaA few weeks later and I have found myself struggling. It’s not that I’m doubting where God has called me or entertaining thoughts of hopelessness. Simply put, I've been feeling mentally and emotionally weighed down. I've journaled, verbally processed with a mentor, called family, listened to encouragement recordings from friends, communicated with the team expressing how they could support me, and I prioritized getting my mind off of myself and onto God through reading, worship and prayer. I'm aware of the importance of practicing self-care, but the most vital point I’ve learned is to not strive to be your own saviour. Although my emotions and mental sate may fluctuate, the truth that God values me (and you) remains constant.
On a day that I took to focus on my mental health, a package arrived from Canada. It was filled with letters and postcards reminding me of home. I've been savouring them by reading one a day, and absorbing all the heartfelt love from my supportive church community. I am thankful to have what feels like an army of individuals who are committed to praying for myself, the team, and the ministry that we do. They also share my belief that I'm exactly where I am meant to be right now, and because of that encourage me so well when I feel like I'm growing in a pressure cooker. The support and timing of it all has been another reminder that God is in the details and deeply cares for me.
Lately I've been leaning in. There are times where I have to posture myself to lean in as if I'm trying to hear someone who is soft-spoken. Then there have been other times where I'm on the edge of my seat, anticipating that God wants to speak, and then completely compelled. Being twenty-three, the well known "The LORD is my Shepherd," has been my chapter for the year. Between my devotionals, worship sessions, and even Bible study at my local church, Psalm 23 is continually being brought to my attention. The more I study it, the more I grasp His unwavering commitment. I've been reminded of something that Papa spoke on our date a few weeks back. I asked Him what my role was on the team. I think I was expecting Him to add on a new responsibility. Instead, He surprised me by saying, "Stay committed to me." It really is that simple. I want to follow His lead.
Psalm 23
The LORD is my shepherd; I have all that I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams. He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name. Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me. You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You honor me by anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings. Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me all the days of my life, and I will live in the house of the LORD forever.
A few times a week, our team goes out into the town with the intention of meeting people. During one of these times, I was able to sit down with a sweet woman. We were under a large tree which was also the same spot that our team often has worship times under. Anyways, we had a conversation about cultures and our shared love for our families. Her arm was in a sling, so we talked about that too. It had recently broken from a fall, along with her clavicle which was sticking out quite a bit. She was in pain. I got to pray with her which kind concluded our time together.
The next day while out in town I saw her again. I approached her excitedly and she seemed happy too. She started curling her arm back and forth, and with a smile on her face said, "I believe now." Her arm was better, and her clavicle had lowered, but it still was requiring more medical attention. She proceeded to point over at the tree and say how something happened when she felt a hand touch her shoulder while I was praying. However, I had been praying right in front of her with my eyes open and nobody touched her. She was stunned. I explained how sometimes we can feel the presence of God through warmth, a cool sensation, or even a physical touch. She opened up more about other encounters she had later on that first day. Ultimately, God met with her and she experienced healing!
As English being my first language, I grew up with so much selection when it comes to the Bible. I've always been able to access many translations and resources so that I can better understand the character and nature of God. To be honest, for most of my life I took not just the selection, but having access to Bibles that I understood for granted. Currently there is a workshop taking place in Broome that is focused on creating an oral translation of the book of Luke into Kimberley Kriol. For some, this will be the first time having a part of the Bible in their mother tongue!
Other exciting news is that we are going on outreach again! Five of us ladies are off to Noonkanbah community for the first week of May. We will be working in the school as chaplains, supporting the staff and students. Our bags are packed and we are eager to go. I am looking forward to getting out there again and connecting with the people!
One week after returning from community, we will be turning around and making the drive up to Kununurra. This will be a two week period where our team will be working in a couple schools teaching on topics such as leadership and friendship. Afterwards, we will be going to Jarlmadangah community for one week. I'm sure we will be running plenty of fun activities engaging with the youth! This three week outreach is costing $640, but thankfully my tax return will be able to cover this (yay taxes)! I'm certainly looking forward to all that is on the horizon.
Happy moments
Apple Cinnamon Scroll, Nutella, Jam, Glazed Pretzel- Guildford Town Bakery {Guildford, Perth}After seven months I have been reunited with my dear friend, Crystal. She surprised me with a freshly baked variety box of donuts from Perth! Bringing the box up to my face, she lifted the lid and the smell hit my nose. I felt like Bruce, the shark, from Finding Nemo. What a rush! It's been a hot minute. Even better than tasting donuts, has been getting to experience some happy life moments with my friend by my side. On her birthday, we were able to see some octopuses, watch a stingray zip past us, and lose our cool when a sea turtle swam right up to us. Living out the Moana dream. It's such a treat to share life with friends.